The Secret Diary of Roberto Martinez Pt 2

It`s been a busy week for Roberto and the boys, let`s see what`s been happening behind closed doors - over to you Roberto:

Monday: I`m in trouble with Mrs Martinez. I promised her I would pick up some potatoes for dinner, but I completely forgot. She isn`t happy, but I told her that I was happy with the intensity and the reaction, but we can learn from this and grow as footballers.

Tuesday: Ronnie is very excited today. He`s been getting very arty these last few weeks, we`ve not seen him for days while he`s been working on his 'masterpiece`. He`s been keeping it in the showers at the Stadium, it`s finally ready today. It`s a life-sized statue of Steven Caldwell, and a very detailed one at that. I`m thinking of playing it at centre back tonight against Aston Villa, it`s probably more mobile. Not sure anyone will notice.

Wednesday: Nobody did notice the statue of Steven. Not even Darren Bent, who was marked out of the game by it. I think we can cancel the search for a new centre back. We might have to put it in storage between games though; Mr Whelan has spent the last hour and a half talking it through the basics of defending set pieces. He used to play football you know, he very rarely mentions it.

Thursday: Bumped into Steve Bruce in Tesco`s today. Funny really, I thought he was more of a Harrods kind of guy. He said he was after a winger; I told him we`ve got one who wants to leave the club for sale and would deal at around £8m. He looked really excited as I gave him the agent`s phone number, not sure how he`ll react when he finds out its Daniel de Ridder instead of Charles N`Zogbia.

Friday: Struggling to decide who to play in goal against Bolton tomorrow. The game clashes with Deal or no Deal and Countdown repeats so Mike won`t want to play, but Chris has to be followed everywhere by a fourteen-strong medical team just in case his back gives in. I wonder if we can get Bolton to show daytime Channel 4 repeats on their big screen, failing that we`ll have to give Chris a zimmer frame and hope for the best.


Sheikh_Mahand


If you missed part one fear not, you can catch up right here






















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