UK time is: 00:25:49
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

The Secret Diary of Roberto Martinez Pt 4


Have you been wondering what could have possibly been going on this week behind the scenes at Latics? Well wonder no more, as we take a peek inside Roberto`s diary and read about the week`s events:

Monday: The lads are teasing Jordi again. The coaching staff have told him that he needs to get stronger to adapt to the Premier League, and have put together a fitness plan for him. Unfortunately, Victor walked in on him doing some after-hours training, dressed in very short shorts and a luminous headband, dancing about the gym to 'Physical` by Olivia Newton-John. This morning the whole squad came into training sporting leg warmers and sweatbands, shouting 'Let`s get physical!` every time Jordi walked past. Jordi was in floods of tears, he had to go home with Graham to calm him down.

Tuesday: We`re getting to the end of our tether with Daniel de Ridder`s behaviour. Today he`s convinced himself that he`s going to be reincarnated, and is burning all of his belongings. All of his clothes, his hair products, his Rick Astley CD collection, everything. Apparently he`s got his sights set on coming back as a pair of straighteners, so he can get closer to fabulous hair. He`ll be disappointed when he wakes up tomorrow and is still training with the reserves.

Wednesday: There has been a lot of talk today about why Young James didn`t travel to play for the Republic of Ireland tonight. Well let me set it straight - it was all the airline`s fault. The Irish FA had booked him on a flight from Liverpool to Dublin, but when we dropped Young James at the airport he refused to get on the plane. Apparently they had refused to show Finding Nemo on the big screen on the plane, due to the flight only being short haul. Young James threw a massive strop and started screaming, we had no choice but to bring him home. I hope Mr Trapattoni understands.

Thursday: We`ve lost Gary Caldwell. Him, Steven and Old James were in a minibus together coming back from Scotland`s game last night but only two of them have shown up for training this morning. I specifically told the driver to watch him when they stopped at petrol stations for a toilet break, but he seems to have slipped away just before they hit Carlisle. After hours of retracing steps and frantic phone calls to the police, we finally found him lied in a park in Lincoln, staggering around. He`d drank that much Stella that he thought his protective mask had transformed him into Jim Carrey`s The Mask. He kept yelling 'SSSSSSMOKIN`` at passers-by, before he collapsed asleep and we could take him home.

Friday: There was a package waiting at the Christopher Park for Charles this morning. It was quite bulky, but there was no sign of a name or a card telling us who it was from. Inside the package was a bus timetable for the Wearside area, and an OS map of the North East. Charles seemed quite happy with it, saying that it would come in handy during the summer. I wonder who it could be from?

Sheikh_Mahand

If you missed any previous entries fear not, they are right here:

Part One

Part Two

Part Three







Join The Vital Debate



Bookmark and Share












Latics and Proud

Fancy writing an article about the Latics? Why not get in touch, we are always looking for new contributors, after all we are all Latics fans here and want to get the Latics message to the world, so if you have a favourite match or Latics memory get it jotted down, or whatever you want to say put it into an email and send it to us here at Vital Wigan

To get your article published just click here and we will put it onto the site






Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Sheikh_Mahand Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Friday February 11 2011

Time: 9:42AM

Your Comments

Excellent stuff, I'll have physical in my head all day now though!!!
worbo
Quality! Good stuff Sheikh.
Bryan plumb
I think De Ridder might become a cult hero at this rate!
J_Mo
 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Wigan Athletic Articles

What The Bosses Said - Latics 1 Boro 1 (Monday November 24 2014)

Support Counts - Latics 1 Boro 1 (Sunday November 23 2014)

Stats: Wigan Athletic v Middlesbrough (Saturday November 22 2014)

Latics v Boro Big Game Preview (Saturday November 22 2014)

Brentford v Latics Fixture Time Change (Thursday November 20 2014)

Malky Mackay Appointed New Latics Boss (Wednesday November 19 2014)

Archived Wigan Athletic Articles

List All Vital Latics Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll

Vital Members League (view all)

1. Whittleblue 206
2. worbo 138
3. scotdave 131
4. russialatic 120
5. hindleymonwafc 116
6. Pauvre Jean 116
7. Jonny_SuffolkLatic 110
8. albert jckson 97
9. Oscarbon 94
10. loudmouthblue 89

League Results (view all)

Latest Results
Wigan 1 - 2 Ipswich
Wigan 1 - 1 Middlesbrough
Wigan 3 - 3 Fulham
Wigan 4 - 0 Birmingham
Charlton 2 - 1 Wigan
Bolton 3 - 1 Wigan

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
18. Millwall 18 4 7 7 -5 19
19. Birmingham 18 4 7 7 -14 19
20. Brighton 18 3 9 6 -3 18
21. Rotherham 18 4 6 8 -10 18
22. Wigan 18 3 8 7 -4 17
23. Bolton 17 5 2 10 -7 17
24. Blackpool 17 1 4 12 -18 7

Breaking League News

On this day 2007
Blackpool : 24/11/2014 20:43:00
Pilkington - Time To Step Up
Cardiff : 24/11/2014 20:20:00
Slade - We're Still A Work In Progress
Cardiff : 24/11/2014 20:15:00
Leeds 'one club man' on Sky TV this week
Leeds Utd : 24/11/2014 19:46:00
Typical Derby For Dunne
Millwall : 24/11/2014 19:22:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Man of the Match v Boro
Suggested By:  Colin Crompton
Scott Carson 1%
Emmerson Boyce 0%
Ivan Ramis 0%
Leon Barnett 0%
Andrew Taylor 0%
Chris McCann 12%
Adam Forshaw 25%
Roger Espinoza 12%
Shaun Maloney 50%
Callum McManaman 0%
Marc-Antoine Fortune 0%