Vital Football

Latest Wigan Atletic News

The Secret Diary of Roberto Martinez - Pt 15

The Secret Diary of Roberto Martinez - Pt 15




The games are rapidly running out for Wigan to stay in the Premier League, let`s see how Roberto and the lads have been preparing for the run-in in the latest Secret Diary:

Monday: Gary and Steven are taunting Hugo after his mistake on Saturday. One of them will go up to him and offer a high five, while the other one sprints up behind Hugo and shout 'HANDBALL!` They even made him go in goal for the whole of our five-a-side games at the end of training. The worst thing was, he didn`t let a single goal in and pulled off some wonderful saves. Naturally, Gary and Steven are taking the credit for converting Hugo into his new position. Perhaps we don`t need to buy Ali after all?

Tuesday: I bought a new television today, after one of Young James`s tantrums broke my other one. The new one is really smart, a big plasma screen above my fireplace. I switched it on to my favourite arts channel, which was showing coverage of the carnival in Rio de Janiero. The picture looked very dull, with all the colours washed out. For the first time I can remember, I was not happy with the intensity. I told the delivery man to take it back and get an LCD screen, I will learn from this and grow as a consumer.

Wednesday: Antolin came into my office this afternoon asking for a pay rise die to his stellar form this season. He`s already on quite a large weekly wage, so I refused his request. I told him once Anderson scores twice in a game for Manchester United I will consider his request. I think our money is safe for a few years yet.

Thursday: Daniel de Ridder was getting very excited today. Apparently, May 4th is the date that his saviour, or whatever it is called in his latest cult, returns to Earth from the heavens. To prepare, he has been giving away all of his personal possessions, and refused to train today. In preparation to meet the saviour, he stripped naked and sat in the centre circle all day, looking at the sky. By lunchtime he had fallen asleep from exhaustion, and because he was getting red from all the sun, I told Old James to put some sunscreen on him to stop Daniel burning. We forgot about him until after training, and when we went back to him he was just waking up. It was only then we realised what a bad idea it was to ask Old James to do his sunscreen - Daniel had woken up with some awful words written on his back using the cream. We`ll have to ring Old James`s mum after this debacle, no way should a boy of his age be using language like that.

Friday: We travelled down to Birmingham a day early for the game on Saturday, to get acclimatised to the city. We have to keep a close eye on Charles, as Birmingham City nearly signed him in the summer - we don`t want to almost lose him again. After a tour of all the best sights of Birmingham - it took nearly 15 minutes - we returned to the hotel. I told Emmerson to guard Charles`s room door, just in case he tried to do a runner, Emmerson is the most dependable member of the squad, we figured it was a safe choice. Just before he went into the room for the night, Charles asked to take a few extra duvets, as it was a little chilly in his room. I gave him some extras from my room, and he scuttled off to bed. Everything was going fine until three in the morning, when I was woken up by Emmerson shouting from the corridor - Charles had gone missing. He had lied to us - his room was roasting, and all his extra blankets were tied in a long rope going out of the window. We`d better find him by tomorrow, that`s the last time we let him have a room of his own.

Sheikh_Mahand

If you missed any previous entries fear not, they are right here:

The Complete Secret Diary Entries




Join The Vital Debate



Bookmark and Share












Latics and Proud

Fancy writing an article about the Latics? Why not get in touch, we are always looking for new contributors, after all we are all Latics fans here and want to get the Latics message to the world, so if you have a favourite match or Latics memory get it jotted down, or whatever you want to say put it into an email and send it to us here at Vital Wigan

To get your article published just click here and we will put it onto the site





Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Sheikh_Mahand
Date:Friday May 6 2011
Time: 8:42AM

Comments

0
I wonder what bad words a young Scottish lad would know? Hmmmm
worbo
06/05/2011 08:58:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Best of Vital Network

Recent Wigan Athletic Articles

Stats: Reading v Wigan Athletic

All the stats from Reading (1) vs (0) Wigan Athletic, The Madejski Stadium, 29/04/14 3pm Att: 19,177

Audio - Graham Barrow - 'It Sounds Like A Complete Mess'

Graham Barrow speaking to BBC Radio Manchester on the Reading game and relegation to League 1 being confirmed:

Audio - Latics CEO Jonathan Jackson On Relegation

Jonathan Jackson speaking to BBC Radio Manchester about relegation to League 1 being confirmed:

The Team Sheets - Reading v Wigan Athletic

The team sheets have been handed in down at the Madejski Stadium:

Archived Vital Latics Articles

Vital Latics articles from

Site Journalists

Barry Worthington
Editor email
Profile
Dan Farrimond (JWAW)
no email
Profile
Adam Convery
no email
Profile
Frank Ford
no email
Profile
Noel Wards Leg
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

The Future
Suggested By: Doris Day
We'll Be Fine15%
I'm Worried52%
Que Sera Sera 33%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
P Brighton 45 28 8 9 92 34
P Newcastle 45 28 7 10 91 42
3 Reading 45 25 7 13 82 2
4 Sheff Wed 45 24 9 12 81 16
5 Huddersfield 45 25 6 14 81 1
6 Fulham 45 21 14 10 77 27
7 Leeds Utd 45 22 8 15 74 14
8 Norwich 45 19 10 16 67 12
9 Derby County 45 18 12 15 66 4
10 Brentford 45 18 10 17 64 12
11 Preston 45 16 14 15 62 2
12 Aston Villa 45 16 13 16 61 -1
13 Cardiff 45 16 11 18 59 -4
14 Barnsley 45 15 13 17 58 0
15 Wolves 45 15 10 20 55 -5
16 Ipswich 45 13 16 16 55 -7
17 Bristol City 45 15 9 21 54 -5
18 Q.P.R. 45 15 8 22 53 -10
19 Burton 45 13 13 19 52 -12
20 Birmingham 45 12 14 19 50 -20
21 Forest 45 13 9 23 48 -13
22 Blackburn 45 11 15 19 48 -14
R Wigan 45 10 11 24 41 -17
R Rotherham 45 5 7 33 22 -58
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
Write for Vital Football

Recent Wigan Athletic Results (view all)

Wigan Athletic Fixtures (view all)

May 7 2017 12:00PM : Leeds United (H)
Sky Bet Championship

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Moonay372
2.Whittleblue290
3.Get a Grip!241
4.truelatic4eva232
5.king_dezeeuw06222
6.Oscarbon165
7.hindleymonwafc127
8.nottinghamlatic119
9.TRUE BELIEVER111
10.WN5100
The Vital Football Members League