Date:Thursday June 2 2011
After countless ups and downs and a last weekend to be remembered, Wigan will be playing in the Premier League for a seventh consecutive season. A magnificent achievement, so big congratulations to the playing and coaching staff. And what better way to sign off a season than with an awards ceremony!
The Olivier Kapo Award for Undeserved International Caps: Mauro Boselli
After watching his bumbling performances up front for Latics in the first six months of the season, you do have to wonder why he managed to accumulate two full caps for Argentina. I can only assume that Lionel Messi, Carlos Tevez, Diego Milito, Sergio Aguero, Gonzalo Higuain and every other striker of Argentinean heritage were tied up in his basement ahead of the game against Ghana in 2009.
Mispronunciation of the Season Award, brought to you by David Pleat: The Stoke City stadium announcer
Now I know that Stoke have a team full of good old-fashioned English names like John and Glenn, but does that really excuse his mangling of our left-back`s name? Apparently we had lining up "Number 31…Mumble…FIGGERA!" It`s said exactly as it`s spelt, for crying out loud.
Most Inappropriate Chant of the Season Award "Ali al-Habsi is a blue, he hates Bolton!" - as started at the Britannia Stadium by none other than Ali`s three-year-old daughter! Not sure the employers would like that much…
The Neville Chamberlain Award for Misplaced Optimism: Paul Scharner
Summer 2010: "I`m leaving Wigan for a big club that will play in Europe". Paul thinks he`s finally on the road to bigger things, after his true quality has been stifled playing in defence at Wigan.
The Grass Isn`t Always Greener Award, sponsored by Nathan Ellington: Paul Scharner
August 2010: He washes up at newly-promoted West Bromwich Albion, who play in precisely zero European competitions and aren`t likely to in the near future. Whoops.
The It Must Make Sense In Holland Award: Ronnie Stam at Bolton
After scoring the late equaliser to secure a point at the Reebok, Ronnie decided to run off towards the opposite corner flag to the travelling fans - to use the gate through the advertising hoardings to get closer to the fans. Not content with running the entire width of the pitch twice in his celebration, he then does what he should have done in the first place and jumps back over the advertising hoardings to return to the pitch. Strange.
The Let`s Have A Look At What You Could Have Won Award, sponsored by Jim Bowen: Birmingham City
August 2010: Charles N`Zogbia is very close to signing for Birmingham City, who are looking at a strong mid-table finish, from Wigan, who have just been spanked 4-0 by newly-promoted Blackpool. The move breaks down at the last minute and Wigan keep hold of their man for the next 12 months. Fast forward to May 2011, and N`Zogbia scores four goals in the last six games to keep Wigan in the Premier League while Birmingham drop through the trap door. Super, smashing, great.
Finally, a huge thank you to everyone who has read and enjoyed the 'Secret Diary` series this year, I am very grateful for any and all comments. Hopefully they will return next year, so until then enjoy the summer!
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Date:Thursday June 2 2011
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