Vital Football

Latest Wigan Atletic News

The Nosey Barstool Chronicles: A goalkeeping solution?

The Nosey Barstool Chronicles: A goalkeeping solution?
'I proudly accept this Premier League trophy on behalf of the people of Wigan,' he mumbled under his breath as he held his favourite Bovril mug aloft.

But Paul Cook's daydream was at once shattered by a knock at the door. He looked up to see Tash Forton, the club's resident small time Internet weblogger, peering through the large hole where a door handle once resided.

'Excuse me, gaffer, but there's a guy that says he can play in goal for us.'

'Oh good, this might save me a job! Send them in,' commanded Cook in a Lord Sugar accent.

'Oh, but I'm already in your office,' came a voice from the waste paper basket. 'I've been here for the last 2 years.'

From the crumpled remains of shredded contracts emerged a raincoat-clad figure. His face was 89% covered in year-old stubble and chunks of morning coffee biscuits.

Lunging forward, Forton snatched the 1920s trilby from his whisky-soaked forehead.

'Gasp, you're not Nosey Barstool, our beloved private investigator... you're Adam Bogdan! I thought you left after the Barnsley floodlight incident!'

'That's what they wanted you to think,' replied the man. 'And I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for those meddling managers.'

Paul Cook raised a quizzical eyebrow. 'Look, forget all that... we need a goalkeeper for Friday's game against Liverpool. Can you handle that?'

Bogdan attempted to light his cigarette with a Smarties packet, but it slipped from his grasp to the heavily scratched linoleum flooring.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Writer:Dan Farrimond
Date:Wednesday July 12 2017
Time: 12:38PM

Login to post a comment

Recent Wigan Athletic Articles

EFL Cup - Falling Attendances & More Rotation

Many fans have watched the seeming demise of the EFL Trophy, and it appears the EFL Cup may now be quickly following suit after the recent third round ties.

EFL In Favour Of Shorter Window & Other Changes

At a meeting of all EFL member clubs yesterday, there was a strong indication they would be in favour of making amendments to the summer's transfer window.

More Reliable Than A League 1 Octopus? (20/9/17)

Time for the special computer that crunches the numbers to determine the final League One positions for the season of 2017/18.

2017 Non League Day Announced

One of the biggest events of the year to promote the Non League game will return for an eighth consecutive season during the next international break.

Archived Vital Latics Articles

Vital Latics articles from

Site Journalists

Liam Sephton
Editor email
Profile
Dan Farrimond
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Will Latics win League One this season?
Suggested By: Paul Cook
Yes39%
No50%
Too early to say11%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
Write for Vital Football

Recent Wigan Athletic Results (view all)

Wigan Athletic Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.truelatic4eva272
2.Kenny Morris107
3.MoMoWafc81
4.Get a Grip!78
5.nottinghamlatic75
6.Moonay71
7.NYC_LATICS71
8.Martinez198669
9.Lazysid64
10.hindleymonwafc60
The Vital Football Members League